Realizing, when someone does not agree with what you are saying does not mean they do not agree with you at all or they do not like you anymore is the most simple key in getting rid of any conflict. Well, it might be a simple thing, but making someone, your kid, realize is the real deal here!
Following are some of the critical pointers, in helping your kid get rid of conflict without fighting.
When your child comes home after a dispute with their friends, listen to their grievances and make sure their relationship remains intact.
For example try saying, “I see you are mad at Lily because she did not let you play with her” instead of “I understand Lily was mean to you.”
This smallest distinction will help your child understand that Lily’s action was mean but not Lily herself.
A fight might lead to a feeling of “I don’t belong here.” It is essential to make them understand every person has different ideas towards the same goal. In the above example, it will be important in making the kid understand how to cooperate rather than compete to play with them.
Talking about these topics with your child might be difficult. But, if you are open enough to have such a conversation, it is a win-win situation.
When your child doesn’t know others as friends or teammates, he/she will always assume that the intention of the other is to hurt them. And where will this come from?
The feeling of getting hurt will either come from fear or anger of being rejected. We are always afraid of what others think about us. And to protect ourselves from those moments of vulnerability, we fight back.
When you see fear or anger surfacing up on your child’s face, talk to them about how they are feeling and make them understand that it is okay to feel vulnerable and opening up about their feelings.